Thursday, September 13, 2012

fresh air, fears and faith

Lately the whole "living in the big city" has been loosing its luster.  Okay, it never really had any at all, in my books.  I really can't stand the city except to maybe visit one (preferably a relatively clean one - which Quito is not) on occasion.  But God brought us here to a very loud, very dirty city.  I've been amazed at how well I've done living here - only by the grace of God, believe me!  As I said, however, I'm starting to fade.  I need to do some heavy relying on God to keep me going.

I miss nature.  I miss the quiet.  And I really miss fresh air.

The other day at work I was painting a big map (I'll probably take a picture and put it on here later) for one of our chapels (and now will be some art work in our office) and it was kind of stinky.  I was so looking forward to going outside and getting some fresh air.  Fresh air never came.  It is a very smoggy city - lots of diesel vehicles, lots of people burning stuff.... fresh air is hard to come by.

I'm also missing moisture.  We haven't had rain in forever and that, combined with the altitude, makes things very very dry.  The kids are all chapped and itchy.  I'm all chapped and itchy.  This may be the first time in my life when I actually want to drink my "needed" 8 glass of water a day - I feel parched all the time.  The upside is that maybe in this time of dryness it will become a habit and then I'll just keep on drinking even when I am not so desperate!

The dryness is reeking havoc with fires though.  We have had a lot of fires lately.  A lot.  And there has been a lot of smoke in the air (adding to the lack of fresh air).  The upside of this (look at me - first whining and complaining but then seeing the positive.....) is that since there is so little nature here and so much concrete, there isn't much to burn.   The fires don't seem to last long.  I guess it is all just a circle of things looking negative and turning into something positive.  Or something like that.

All of this is affecting one of the kids much more than the others.  A precious little heart.  First, she gets chapped the worst - really rough dry hands and patches on her sweet face.  Second, and much more heart-wrenching, is that fear has overtaken her lately.  Seeing the smoke billows so often, smelling the fire in the air is causing a lot of anxiety and accompanying stomach aches.

Again we are praying that God works these fears into faith.  Many times I have prayed that prayer and many times I will continue to pray.  Good thing that God is the inventor of taking the negative and turning it into something positive.  I anticipate what He will spin in her.

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