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Sunday, September 12, 2010

A "how to" for Official Ecuadorian Government Documents

  • Have a neighbor take all six of you to the official office, without a clear sign stating that it is the correct place, at 8:00 a.m. on Saturday.
  • Discover that they just recently (within the last two weeks) changed the hours to 9:00 - 12:00 instead of 8:00 - 12:00.
  • Drive home.
  • Return at 9:00 and wait to get your number. Have a lady cut in front of you to get her number first.
  • Wait....
  • Run to a store, buy a glue stick, because you need to glue all of your pictures on the outside of your envelopes.
  • Tell your kids to please be more quiet.
  • Wait....
  • Wait....
  • Beg your kids to keep it down and respect the people around you.
  • Have someone go sit themselves down in the chair to be served, as soon as the chair is empty, even though they came in after you. Have the guy serve them first even though it isn't their turn.
  • Wait....
  • Wait....
  • Have someone else cut in as in the aforementioned situation.
  • Wait....
  • Have your number called. The man will then tell you that each person in your family needs their own number, in order to be served.
  • Explain to the man, in your politest but quite broken Spanish, that you were only given one number, by his coworker, and would it really matter anyway - seeing as you would have all of the numbers in a row, so the wait time would be the same for the next person? (Hold your tongue, not saying what you want.... something to the effect of "Why in the world are you lecturing me about this when we are waiting here with our four kids, they are getting very hungry and impatient, and you just let two people cut in front of us when their numbers are after us??????")
  • Be told you need to go get photocopies of pages you thought you already had copies of.
  • Get photocopies made (next door, thank the Lord).
  • Have the guy discover that you did, after all, have those correct photocopies already, but you do have to go make copies of something else in each of your passports.
  • Bring the copies back and have the guy tell you that you need a copy of your electricity bill for each individual person, not just one for the family.
  • Go make five copies of the electricity bill.
  • Have everyone's picture taken. Have everyone sign names, check information, etc.
  • Receive your cards loosely in their little official plastic folders with numbers and what-not on them.
  • Have the guy tell you how to laminate your Official Ecuadorian Government Documents (Censos), because, of course, you always laminate Official Ecuadorian Government Documents at home..... It must not be official if they actually have a laminating machine there to do it.
  • Take a taxi home because your dear, sweet neighbors who took you couldn't wait any longer and had to leave a while ago.

  • Take out your Official Ecuadorian Government Iron, turn on to high heat and wait for it to warm.
  • Take out an older pillow case to be your Official Ecuadorian Pressing Sheet.
  • Press each card, in between the pillow case, to "laminate" your Official Ecuadorian Government Document.
  • Allow to cool.
  • Your Official Ecuadorian Government Documents are now completed.... and Official.
  • Admire the matching grumpy expressions on two of your delightful children's faces to serve as a reminder of all the good times in acquiring your Official Ecuadorian Government Documents.

2 comments:

  1. Oh my. Oh, oh my. Did you fall down a rabbit hole? It sounds like you were visiting the mad hatter at his office.

    Love the story and pics. There's a book in the making here.

    p.s..we share a middle name : )

    ReplyDelete
  2. can I use your official government iron to laminate our censos as well?

    ReplyDelete