materialism

I am really wrestling. I have been for a while but it just came up again today.
Wrestling with materialism.

When we first felt that God was wanting us to go on the mission field, I felt so glad that I would be away from such a materialistic culture. I get so tired of it. Tired of seeing all of the striving for "stuff" and sometimes, too often, wrestling with it myself. I was excited to be free of so much of that. I looked forward to living more simply, having less and not feeling pressured to have more and have everything perfect. I really believe that Christ can work and speak more clearly to us and with us when we are not so distracted by stuff.
Costa Rica was good. We had a very small house, in pretty rough shape, nothing pretty to decorate with - bare bones, tight space and definitely simple. It often was a little too much that way, for my preference.... I longed for a little more comfortable furniture (that was the biggest thing), a little more space where we could get away from each other when needed and a few pretty or fun things to give the house some warmth and charm. But the simplicity was wonderful!
When getting going to move to Ecuador, a family contacted us to see if we wanted to rent the house they were leaving. Our three most important desires were met in this house: four bedrooms, low rent and walking distance to our ministry. So we took it.
Now we are here and we know that is it in a wealthyish neighborhood. It is bigger than we expected (not ginormous, but a decent size), much bigger than our house in Costa Rica and really quite nice.
But now I feel guilty.
And I am struggling with materialism again.
My creative mind is abuzz with ideas to decorate and make our house fun and homey. I want to go and spend money to make curtains and pillows and stuff (even though it is pretty hard to find some of that stuff here!). I want to have a nice table made for our family.
How much of this is okay?
How much of this is too much?
I've been reading Romans 8 (and 7). How much is my sinful nature involved here? Or how much of it is just my God given desire for beauty?
Life would be harder living in the jungle, but life would also be easier.
When I thought of being a missionary I had much more of the living-in-a-hut-type-missionary in mind - the jungle type. Or at least not a nice house, in a nice neighborhood. I thought much more of "suffering for Jesus" in the materialistic sense. I know that some people discredit missionaries who are not doing this or who are not missionaries to "unreached people groups". It hurts and is frustrating when we believe that this is where He led us to, even when we were willing to go elsewhere.

I guess the suffering we are doing is more in the language, culture and really, really missing family and friends... but it just doesn't feel like enough. Yet I know that isn't want Christ calls everyone to do. And I guess He hasn't called us to do that, at least not right now. And, more so, we don't have to earn our salvation by going to where is seems like we would suffer more. I believe we have followed Him here, even to the house we are in. Maybe we made a mistake or assumption. I don't know. What I do know is that right now, I need to get over my feelings of guilt, trust that He has directed us and will direct us and not worry about the judgement of others. We are accountable to Him. To follow His will for our lives. To live where He wants us to live, to serve where He wants us to serve....
And that is the very very best thing for us.

In the meantime, I'll still wrestle.