a teenager

My baby.

Almost thirteen years ago (minus about 3.5 hours) my labor started to bring this girl into the world:

And my world was never the same again.

I remember the day I gave birth to her I thought

"I will never not be a mom again"

I just finished tucking in my 12-year-old for the last time.

Tomorrow she is 13.

Thirteen.

A teenager.

She's my baby still, you know?

I tucked her in,

prayed with her,

and started bawling like a little baby.

I can hardly write this as I can hardly see the screen through the tears.

(at least my fingers know where to go)

People tell you that all the time:

"the years go so fast"

"cherish them while they are young"

"they'll be grown up in no time"

And they are usually telling you that when you child is kicking and screaming because you stopped them from pulling off everything on the shelves in the store.... and all you wanted to do was quickly run in and grab a few things.

You (okay, me) almost want to punch those people in the nose when they say it, 'cause you're (okay, I'm) thinking - "I can hardly wait until they do grow up!!!"

Even then, I knew they were right.

And often I worked hard at cherishing the young years.

And I still do with the younger ones.

But it really does go too fast.

(okay, okay, I know she isn't moving out of the house and getting married... but it is still a teeny bit traumatic for me, alright!?)

Sigh.

She'll never be a child again.

So yes, I am grieving.

Besides, I'm too young to be the mother of a teenager!